I had a very hair raising experience recently which didn’t scare me, but it sent me somewhere i was scared to go for a very long time. This place is in you’re heart…

My best friend saved my life the other day, literally, by mear seconds, I was so busy getting lost in my feelings I was completely oblivious to the world i didn’t have a clue where i was i was off somewhere else completely. He managed to just pinch my shirt with his fingers in time to pull me out of the way or i would have been gone, for good it was undeniable i needed to think about things clearly.

I was extremely emotional from that point on, i was battling to find where i had been when this event occured and i just could not find it. I lay in bed thinking and crying for a day or so and things started to get clearer and clearer. It was really something unbelievable to me, i was identifying emotions which i had no clue about, things that had been troubling me for a very long time.

Things about my relationship with my Mother and about my brother dying… things i thought were all in order and in the realm of normal emotional experience. Clearly i could not have been more wrong about myself. People sometimes admire who I am inside and think that I am a specific type of person… I am not sure they are correct all the time. In a way it is really strange because how could they know who I am if I haven’t been true to me?